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Self-harm is a difficult and frequently misunderstood issue that affects individuals from all walks of life. Due to stigmas surrounding mental health topics, most people kept it as a private matter, but overcoming self harm is important. It’s far more often than most people think. Understanding what motivates someone to harm themselves is important, as people engage in it for diverse reasons. Often a sign of difficulty managing emotions, self-harm can be used as a coping mechanism to manage stress, with inflicting pain seen as a way to control overwhelming feelings. This struggle often remains hidden, as fear and shame make many afraid to seek help.
Self-harm isn’t the answer. Understand the “why” behind self harm & explore healthier coping mechanisms:
Understanding Self-Harm
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One of the biggest barriers to understanding intentional self harm, self harm behavior, and coping strategy is the stigma surrounding it. Mistakenly, many people believe it’s simply a phase or an attention-seeking behavior. However, self-harm is a severe issue with underlying causes that require serious help. While it may offer temporary relief, it doesn’t address the root of the problem and can even trigger complicated emotions like shame and guilt. Importantly, even though there are reasons behind every self-harm, it’s crucial to understand that once it becomes a pattern, breaking free can be difficult.
How can you tell the difference between suicide and non-suicidal self-injury?
The difference between suicide and self-injury lies in the intent. One of the most common misconceptions is that self-harm is a suicide attempt. However, this is rarely the case. Suicide is an act of despair, hopelessness, and worthlessness to end one’s life, often accompanied by persistent and intense suicidal thoughts. On the other hand, self-harm, also known as non-suicidal self-injury, is a self-destructive coping mechanism used by individuals struggling with difficult emotions, mental health problems, or trauma. Unlike suicide, these acts are not intended to end one’s life.
Who is at risk for self-injury behaviors?
Self-injury behaviors can affect individuals of any age, gender, or cultural background, though they are more common among young adults and adolescents, particularly between the ages of 12 and 25. It’s important to remember that self-harm can start earlier and continue for years, impacting people across any age range.
If you are a young person dealing with self-harm, a family member or know someone who is, please reach out for help. Note, self-harm is a difficult challenging problem that is frequently connected to deeper issues. Seeking professional help is essential for developing healthy coping mechanism and building resilience. Those who are at risk of self-harm:
- With depression & anxiety
- With childhood trauma
- With eating disorders
- With borderline personality disorder
- With posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD)
- With traumatic psychological disorder
- With childhood trauma
- With low self-esteem
Why people harm themselves
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Most people find it difficult to understand why someone would harm themselves. Self harming behaviour results from a complicated mix of emotion and traumatic events, including overwhelming fear, grief, and intense anger. These emotion can manifest as self harm urges to:
- To reduce anxiety or tension
- To feel in control
- To release anger
- To release painful emotions
- To feel relieved
- To cope with self-blame
- To feel something (numbness is a common symptom of depression)
- To escape loneliness or sadness
Self-Harm Triggers and Finding Alternatives
While the triggers leading to self harming behavior are subjective and personal, understanding early warning signs can help prevent harmful behaviors. Emotional distress (including difficult feelings and emotional pain), relationship issues, parental behavior, stress, trauma, and mental health disorders can all be triggers. These can manifest in early warning signs like withdrawal, mood swings, behavioral changes, and secretive behavior.
It’s important to remember that there are always alternatives. Here are some healthier ways you can try:
Delay & Distract: Choose to delay self harm for a set period, even if it’s just 10 minutes. During this time, engage in a distracting activity like drawing, exercising, holding ice cubes, or listening to music.
Express Yourself: Talk to a trusted friend, write in a diary, or express your feelings creatively through art or music.
Connect & Relax: Take a deep breath, take a relaxing bath, listen to calming music, or connect with loved ones for support.
Seek Professional Help: If the feelings are overwhelming, always remember that asking for help from a professional is a sign of strength, not weakness.
It’s important to approach people showing these symptoms with understanding and compassion while encouraging them to seek help from a professional and explore coping strategies like commitment therapy.
Finding Strength in Healing
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When it comes to mental health healing, we often focus on identifying flaws within ourselves. However, finding strength in the healing process is an important, often overlooked aspect. Effective treatment for mental illness plays a crucial role in this journey. The minute you learn to accept your pain and challenges without judgment and begin seeking help, your healing progress starts. This can involve cultivating self-compassion and treating yourself with kindness and understanding. By doing so, you can gently release negative self-perceptions and weaken the urge to harm yourself.
As you learn to view yourself with compassion and empathy, you’ll naturally extend these qualities toward others, fostering stronger relationships and reducing feelings of isolation. Recognizing that setbacks and difficulties are simply a normal part of the human experience allows you to break free from the cycle of self-harm and cultivate a healthier, more fulfilling life.
Seeking Help and Support
One of the most crucial steps towards healing, development, and living healthier lives is seeking help and support. As with other mental health issues, talking about self-harm can be difficult. However, asking for help demonstrates bravery, and addressing the problem can break the cycle and pave the way for a brighter future.
Start seeking help with healthy coping mechanism like talking to therapists, counselors, and support groups that can offer insightful advice, coping strategies, and emotional support. They can also help identify the underlying causes of self-harm and create new, healthier mechanisms for handling stress and intense emotions. Remember, there is hope for healing, and that you are not alone in this fight. Don’t hesitate to reach out for help.
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Don’t struggle alone. Take the first step with Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) at Milestone Health Center.
We understand that reaching out for help can be difficult, but it’s a sign of strength, not weakness. You deserve to feel supported and empowered. Milestone Health Center offers compassionate therapists and effective treatments like Cognitive Behavioral Therapy to help you overcome social anxiety, addiction, and other mental health condition. Take the first step towards feeling better; connect with us today.